Jealousy is not Love

Canadian self-help author, intuitive teacher and workshop facilitator Tanis McRae encourages, inspires and teaches personal self-responsibility. She brings a teacher mentality to conscious expansion by encouraging and directing you to take back your power and consciously create the life you want to live. She sees many concepts with a fresh new perspective, which allows for effortless personal growth, self-empowerment and change. By bringing out the deeper truths that our expanding consciousness knows to be true we discover the distortion that the collective conditioning we experienced as children has buried deep under layers of fear and ignorance. When we take back and live as our true selves we are no longer subject to manipulation and being disempowered by others. Her book “Talking to My Self – Evolving on Purpose” is designed to inspire your expanding consciousness as well as serve as a catalyst for personal change. It allows you to reclaim who you are by moving away from suffering and managing the pain or people in your life, to becoming a confident conscious creator of your life through utilizing and expanding your personal intuition.

Jealousy is not love.

Jealousy is a lot of things but it is not love.

Jealousy is fear.

Jealousy is obsession, possession, acidic, corrosive, manic, and poisonous.

But it is not love.

It is thought that this demonstration of possessiveness brings people closer together because they see it as a feeling of loving another above all others. That when you are jealous of anyone else having that attention it can make people feel exclusive which on some level allows them to feel safe and secure.

This is a temporary condition because it is based in separation.

It ultimately separates you from them because no one sustains being owned, possessed or kept for a long time. The safe feeling it creates in the beginning is an illusion and will eventually take away their feelings of freedom, choice and self worth. Ultimately they will resent the possession and from the moment they choose to reclaim themselves that bond is broken.

All relationships based on this high level of need will self-destruct.

Relationships are not meant to be exclusive but rather inclusive – we need to be a willing participant in all of our relationships… ALL OF THEM!

If people in relationships are not there willingly then how does that differ from being owned or possessed by another?

I want all of the people in my life to be in my life willingly. If they are not in a relationship with me fully by their own choice then the most beautiful thing I can do is to ‘gift them with my absence.’ And gift myself with theirs.

Someone asked me, ”What does it feel like to be married for 26 years to someone?” My answer, “I still really like who I am when I am with him and that feels amazing.”

I am in my relationship sharing who I am with my husband and he with me. And when I find that I do not like myself in some aspect of our relationship then I seek to change that about me. But it does not serve either of us to seek to change the other and when that inevitably happens we communicate and work to find ourselves in it again. This will always happen because we are evolving and changing who we are in every moment.

When you love yourself enough to nurture who you are in the relationship you are in with anyone then the relationship is healthy.

Jealousy cannot survive in a healthy relationship because the relationship is based on free will and personal choice.

Jealousy is not love.

Loving yourself and sharing that with another is love.